Don't Kid Yourself

I was at a picnic this weekend and someone asked, what do you do?

"I teach strategic networking skills classes that improve net worth."

Suddenly, there was a strange QUIET at the table..... I felt like I said something wrong. So, instead of crawling under the table, I repeated it.

"Yes, I teach networking skills - whether you're looking for a job or looking to do a better job AT your current job."

Still silence.

"Oh," one person finally said flatly. "I hate networking."

"Really, I asked? You should take our Contacts Count course, it might change your perspective.

"No," she continued. "No, networking is not for me. I hate going to networking events. Since I'm on the client end, people who meet me always want something from me. I have enough contacts in my network with my vendors......"

She continued to explain, but her words were swallowed up by another conversation that started at the table, and then we all got interrupted by the fireworks and never got back to the topic at hand.

I thought about it later, and remembered many a colleague who was crushed when laid off from their 'client jobs' and shocked at how all of the people who cared so much about them, and showered them with gifts, were no longer there for them. Hmmmmm.

"Don't kid yourself," I thought to myself. Don't pretend that your network is big enough, good enough or as good as it's ever going to get. As we grow in business and as the marketplace changes, our networks have to grow and change as well.

If you don't want to be stagnant, you better continually be creating, cultivating and capitalizing on your networking. You better nurture your business relationships and stay in good standing with different types of people in different places.

Think about it. How diverse is your network? Are there young people in your network? Old? Are there Clients? Vendors? Students? Mentors? Interns? Experienced people? Newbies? Do you have people in your field, from associations, who you can turn to, to benchmark, get the latest in trends and best practices? Do you have a strategy? Do you get bottom-line results from your networking?

Or, are you just going to networking events, because you think you should? And, you figure, you'll just hang out and have a drink, visit with your friends and current vendors and dismiss the people who you don'think you will 'need'.

Don't kid yourself. There are people who may not seem like 'likely good networkers' who have brothers, or neighbors or fathers who could hire or fire you!

Don't kid yourself. If you get your pink slip tomorrow, do you REALLY think your current vendors would still be sucking up and coming to your rescue to help you land a new job?

Don't kid yourself. Don't keep yourself in a networking 'silo.' We can learn from other industries and other people. How do you think McDonalds came up with the drive-through idea.... by learning about banking and the drive-through window!

Don't kid yourself. Even if you don't like networking events, you can still connect with others that you could learn from. Maybe lunches and one-one-one coffee dates make more sense for you. Maybe you're shy but do better at standing out and making a reputation for yourself by answering questions on Linked In.

Don't kid yourself. With the highest unemployment rates we've seen in a long time, no one is safe. No one knows what the future will bring. With social media on the rise, now is the time to use face-to-face networking, LinkedIn, Twitter and Facebook to your advantage. You don't have to spend time reinventing the wheel when someone 1/2 way across the world is in your Linked In Group, willingly shares articles and tips with you. Information and ideas are so easily and quickly accessed, that no one should be the 'lone ranger' and no one should hate 'networking!'

WHEN THE GOING GETS TOUGH ...

The tough get networking!

How about you? Do you get it? Do you make networking a way of life, or is it a 'to do' on your chore list?

The old school of networking was: "YIKES, I need a job; I better get networking."
The new school of networking is all about continual teaching and giving.

Teaching people what you're good at and what would help you in your business life and learning what would help them, and giving them ideas, resources or leads to help them achieve their objectives.

It's been said over and over that the opposite of networking is NOT working.

When you continually think of your network as a means of support, you are more like to work it, or stay in touch with people. How do you do a better job at staying in touch with people? ASK more questions.

When you listen and listen generously.... you will learn how to follow up with them. You will know what their passions are, their challenges and what they do well and what they are interested in. When you give first, and give generously, the Law of Reciprocity comes into effect and you will soon be given an idea or resource as well. Try it! (That 'give and take' is the premise of networking.)

If you don't 'work it' or remain engaged with people in your network, you aren't working to your capacity. You don't have to be a Lone Ranger. Learn to rely on others for best practices, shortcuts, ideas, resources. Don't reinvent the wheel.

For more information on giving and getting, and how to have more purposeful conversations, read Chapter 10 in Make Your Contacts Count, by Anne Baber and Lynne Waymon.